Ladies Only

The technology struggle is real!

I’ve relaunched the blog! It’s now on a different, self-hosted platform, which means I’m having to learn a few new tricks and do things slightly differently. There’s nothing quite like getting to know a system really well, then throwing it out the window and starting again with something that looks similar but is, in fact, a souped-up, all-singing, all-dancing version that turns my brain to putty.

I like it when the technology I use stays the same. Maybe I’m easily confused, but it irked me recently when my Outlook mail account started sorting my inbox for me into ‘Focused’ messages and ‘Others’. I mean: How does it KNOW which emails I need to read and which ones I can ignore? All that happens is I think I’m caught up, and then I find a whole pile of messages sitting smugly and silently in the ‘Others’ folder. Can I next expect an algorithm humanoid to show up at my office to rearrange the files in my filing cabinet? Needless to say, I’m still trying to figure out how to turn this new Outlook feature off.

I’m also one of those people who see those little icons and pop-up messages on my computer, iPad and iPhone, indicating there is a new software update available, and inwardly groan. The thought of having to download and install whatever it is they’ve come up with now fills me with distrust. I find it disruptive. And then I ignore it, thinking ‘I don’t need it anyway’, ‘My computer’s working just fine’ or ‘This update’s not for me!’

old TV
Turning the telly on was much easier in days gone by

Okay, while I’m at it, it also annoys me that turning on a TV these days requires three remotes with 60 buttons. I quote Bridget Jones: “Suspect designed by 13-year-old technogeeks, competing with each other from sordid bedrooms, leaving everyone else thinking they’re the only person in the world who doesn’t understand what the buttons are for, thus wreaking psychological damage on a massive, global scale.”

And I’m not even going to tell you what happened last week when I attempted to operate our tumble dryer for the first time (in my defence, we rarely use it – the climate ensures clothes become bone-dry super fast when hung outside). Okay, briefly: It was nearly midnight. The dog had peed on the clean duvet that my mother-in-law, arriving very late, was to use. The buttons had only strange hieroglyphic swirls on them. There seemed to be about 40 different drying combinations, none of which actually dried the duvet in time. I felt like a man.

Am I the only person who thinks it’s all getting a bit ridiculous?

Getting water from the fridge has even become a complicated task. There’s a type of fridge – a Kenmore Elite I believe – that offers you temperature options, manual, automatic. You have to choose how many ounces of water you want (who knows how many ounces a glass takes?!?!), what type of ice, and more.

Anyway, rant over. I’m working on my trust issues. In the interest of keeping up with my older son, who has become so fluent in technology it’s downright intimidating, I’ve decided to try to tackle all these technical things head on. I’m going to stop being scared of software updates, turning the TV on, operating the dryer, and hope this makes life run more smoothly.

Welcome to the new-look blog – and forgive me if it takes me a while to figure out what all the damn bells and whistles do.