You’ve probably heard that the Earth is detonating tomorrow. According to the ancient Mayan prophecy, 21 December 2012 will be the end of the world as we know it, and if you look at the shooting meteorites forecast for Friday, this appears to be true.
While contemplating this fiery damnation, I asked DH: “What would you do if the world really was ending tomorrow?”
“I wouldn’t be doing SIMs [airline speak for simulator training] the day before,” he grumbled, barely looking up from his Airbus test preparation.
I tried again with BB. “How about you? What would you do if this was our last day on Earth?”
He looked alarmed. I tried to explain that it (most likely) wasn’t true, but that if it was, we could spend our last day doing whatever he wanted to do. Perhaps playing Lego, or eating cake all day.
“I know,” he said. “I’d stop the Earth from going away.” [that’s my boy, young enough to still think he can save the world].
If he couldn’t do that (and I really didn’t mean to put a dampner on the idea), I suggested we get on Daddy’s airplane – there’s an on-board shower spa – and fly it to space.
“Don’t be silly Mummy!” exclaimed BB, raising his eyebrows at me. “We’d run out of gas long before we got to space. Far better to take a space rocket.”
You’ve got to hand it to seven-year-olds – absolutely anything is possible.
Of course, I’d spend my last day on Earth with my family, but there are a few other things that I haven’t got round to doing yet that I might try to squeeze in:
– Sleep under the stars (en famille) on one of The World desert islands (the one with beach-club facilities, not deserted, obviously)
– Sand board down a massive sand dune, standing up
– Raid the Gold & Diamond Park, hot foot it across the marble floors of the Mall of the Emirates to Harvey Nicks and play dress-up with the loot
– Take a helicopter to the Burj Al Arab hotel, check in to a VVIP suite and order absolutely everything from the room-service menu
– Tell the very annoying person I see at work that he’s a muppet
– Give every roadhog I come across the birdie
– Go skinny-dipping at midnight in a pool filled with pink champagne
– Shimmy on the tables at the Cavalli Club
– Do the school run in my pyjamas
On the off-chance that it is 1250 degrees tomorrow (a dark comet is the most likely scenario), have a fabulous night!